Sunday, October 30, 2005

Camel; £91

There can be few creatures who can portray such an impenetrable visage of disgusted supercilliousness as the camel. Every feature on a camel's face seems to have been constructed so that the beast can always show clearly that everything and anything that it could possibly encounter are so dreary, so insignificant, and so inferior as to hold no possible interest for the eyes beneath the long lazily blinking eyelashes. Apparently the spit from camels and llamas (a llama ate Liz's sandwich when she was little) tastes of yoghurt. They are apparently very accurate with their spittle-aim, and it is alleged that their range of fire is always slightly longer than you thought it was - regardless of what you thought it was. They're reputed to be stroppy, grumpy things - presumably spawning the phrase "got the hump" with their legendary diva temprament.

Camels, however, get away with their foibles because they are just so well-suited to their environment. The ships of the desert are perfectly designed for their environment, their bizzare capacity for time without food and water, their feet, even those sweeping proud eyelashes. That's why anyone would want one - although I'm sure they can be very nice when you get to know them.

[ Oxfam Unwrapped, www.oxfamunwrapped.com ]

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